Dear Donald, Fire Away My Friend

Dear Donald,

I am writing you this letter because as an American citizen I have a couple of questions as well as a few things to say to you. I’m more than willing to accept the risk of you reading this and firing off some of your trademark caustic insults.

First, I have a question concerning the U.S. Constitution, you know, one of the founding documents of this country, otherwise known as that document you will be sworn to uphold if and when you become president. My question is this – how do you reconcile the rights, privileges,and limits of governmental power that are explicitly and implicitly stated and detailed in this beautiful document with some of your more ludicrous proposals? I want to know – how do you run for president and not know that banning people because of their religious preference and deporting millions of others because of their ethnicity are both clearly illegal under the law of the land and run directly counter to the principles of the country that you claim to love so much?

I ask this question, Donald, because based on your moronic rhetoric, you seem to be totally oblivious to the concepts of the rule of law, of the separation of powers, of the Bill of Rights and of how the American government works in general. This in and of itself while unfortunate, isn’t a crime for the normal everyday citizen (and, undoubtedly, it appears a lot of your supporters are just as uninformed as you), but for a presidential candidate, it is unfathomable.

Another question I have for you is just what is it with you and women, Donald? Where does all of the animus come from? While I will admit this country has seen its share of women-hating politicians, you are by far the slimiest Neanderthal to ever stumble and droop across the American political stage. Are you compensating for something? Behind all the deprecating vitriol that comes out of your mouth directed at females, I am beginning to think you are. When the history of the 2016 election is written, and there will be volumes written about you to be sure, I will not be surprised to find that one of the things historians discover about you is that Trump Tower was a symbol, literally and figuratively, for what you were lacking in the manhood department.

I have always been a firm believer, Donald, that on a day to day basis women have it harder in this life than men and one of the biggest reasons why is that they have to suffer daily from the likes of supercilious jackasses, such as yourself, in their jobs, homes and the world, in general.

I am sure you envision yourself as this god-like man, Donald, towering over anyone who possesses a vagina, but what I see is something different. I see a thumb sucking child-man, being fueled by his overwhelming insecurities, steadily fantasizing that he is standing over the women in this country, reaching down with his puny hands and unzipping his fly and waiting for all of them to kneel and worship him. Thinking of my dear, precious sisters-in-arms and their beautiful fighting spirit Donald, I think you are in for a rude awakening, you rank buffoon, when instead of kneeling down and submitting to you, they collectively knee you in your puny infinitesimal kahunas—that is if they can locate them.

Donald, I get it. You are a slithering, fork-tongued swindler, betting on cashing in on the great dumbing down of America.

Your party, the Republican party, has been leading this twisted and self-serving charge for decades now. You are their histrionic sociopath and together you and your party are playing a cynical and perverse game with all of America by trying to present you as a viable candidate for the highest office in the land. You seem to be too dimwitted to even realize the ramifications of your villainous words and actions and they, the members of your party who are endorsing you, and your supporters in general, are willing co-conspirators in the attempted hijacking of the American Experiment.

Just to serve notice to you and your ilk, Donald, this country, our country, is already great. We don’t need you and your henchmen to put your grimy, money-grubbing hands on her to “make ” her great again. “Make America Great Again?” Seriously Donald? What the fuck does that even mean?

Here’s a thought—how about we keep it great by keeping you and as many of your criminally collaborating Republican friends from holding office in this magnificent country that you and them are so seemingly dissatisfied with.

One more thing Donald. Please don’t misconstrue my words when I say this to you – I believe that you, Donald Trump, are a human piece of excrement whose only redeeming quality is that you have shown all of us that our country is in need of a spiritual and intellectual enema.

You and the despicable ideas that you espouse need to be flushed down the proverbial American toilet this coming election day. I am looking forward with excitement to the evening of November 8th, 2016, most specifically that moment in time when you morph into that repugnant thing that you so abhor. Yes, Donald, I am talking about that spectacular marking of the clock when you have to acknowledge to the entire world, what me and others who think like me already know – that you are a f**king LOSER, LOSER, LOSER.


John Michael Antonio

Photo Credit: torbakhopper via Compfight cc

John Michael Antonio

John Michael Antonio is a freelance writer, photographer, poet and screenwriter. He claims his Midwestern roots while at the same time admitting his incurable and insatiable love and addiction for all things New York City. He has been the husband to his wife, the love of his life, for almost thirty years and is a father of three wonderful children. He is an unapologetic male feminist as well as a passionate lover of fashion, art, movies and music from all eras and genres. An endless dreamer, John Michael is also an avid historian, ex-punk rocker and a legendary Internet surfer who sleeps, on average, about four hours a day. His main personal website, The World of John Michael Antonio, can be found at

  1. Mike Fanning

    Thank you for pointing out his gross ignorance of the founding principles of this country, as well as the ignorance of those who follow.

  2. Avatar

    Thank you Julie. It is my hope that it does go viral and Trump personally addresses it. One can only hope. Bring it on, Donald. You are right about the state of our country right now – it is the most terrifying thing I have ever seen. We have to fight fire with fire and none of us can afford to sit on the sideline when it comes to stopping him. He must be stopped and he will be stopped.

  3. Julie Anderson

    Dear John,

    I am still in shock that The Donald is still breathing. Maybe karma does not exist after all. This letter describes him perfectly. This letter describes the collective lunacy that our citizenry and government currently revels in. This letter deserves to go viral.

    Thank you.

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