The Pursuit of Perfection is Bullsh*t

Living life in front of the lens has its perks, namely access to incredible beauty magicians.High fashion artists, makeup and hair stylists, as well as fashion stylists are the wizards behind the curtain.  I have relied on them for many years. They taught me how pluck, tuck, plump and properly primp.

Because of my youth, at the time, I took all of the fabulosity for granted. I always looked great … the wizards made sure of it.

Even though I was put together by a top-of-the-line team, my images were still Photoshopped. Even though I was a spring chicken, I still was wiped clean, not a blemish, not a line, nothing made it past the cruel eyes of the myth masters.

Even though I knew it was a “fake” representation of me, my ego still exploded.

I was PERFECT.

Fortune still shines upon me; I still enjoy working as a fashion model. The only snag is, well, I am older. Now I find myself struggling to keep up with the unattainable standard of perfection that society has bestowed on us

Sure, there are tricks of the trade that I utilize.  AND lucky for me, I still have access to teams that work their most excellent magic on me. Honestly, though, when I have to do it myself, I’d rather die!  (Kidding of course, but it’s not fun.)

Take my skin, for example, it is not porcelain smooth anymore. With all of the Photoshopped, ridiculously young faces peering out at me from magazines and castings, I feel like I am a thousand years old.

Let’s talk about my eyebrows or lack thereof. I’m sure you’ve heard that old wives’ tale about pluck too much and they will never grow back. It is true. I am lucky to have five hairs left, on my eyebrows I mean.

If we are talking nostrils, well, that is another story altogether. We lose our eyebrows and eyelashes as we age, but gain unruly nostril hairs, random facial hair, as well as other strange crops of hair in unwanted areas. I wish that I knew the evolutionary reason for this phenomenon.

Whatever. I pluck, tuck, primp and prod.  If you met me out and about, you would probably say “What’s she bitching about?”

Trust me, a lot.

Like all women, the hands of time do not stand still for me.

Like all women, I live with the undeniable message that society keeps shoving down my throat:

YOUTH = DESIRABILITY

Like all women, once we are over 35, as far as the media and mainstream society are concerned, we are sent out to pasture. Why is that I wonder?  Perversion. Bullsh*t.

What is Perfection anyway?

In my opinion, perfection is attained when a person feels great in their skin. When a person owns their flaws without shame and doesn’t let society dictate how or what they should look like, they are truly beautiful. Only then can they attain perfection. 

Living in a false bubble of fake beauty standards is bullsh*t. Just be you. I will be me. We are perfect just the way we are. That’s the truth. I promise.

Photo: ©Julie Anderson All Rights Reserved

Julie Anderson

Julie Anderson is the Creator and Publisher of Feminine Collective. Julie was inspired to create this safe place for women to share their secrets, desires, triumphs and pain as the antithesis of what mainstream media offers women today. In her column Pursuit of Perfection, she explores the importance of rectifying the balance of inner and outer beauty through essays, poems and articles on self-esteem, shame, family, and self- acceptance.

Written by 

Julie Anderson is the Creator and Publisher of Feminine Collective. Julie was inspired to create this safe place for women to share their secrets, desires, triumphs and pain as the antithesis of what mainstream media offers women today. In her column Pursuit of Perfection, she explores the importance of rectifying the balance of inner and outer beauty through essays, poems and articles on self-esteem, shame, family, and self- acceptance.

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15 thoughts on “The Pursuit of Perfection is Bullsh*t

  1. Donna,
    Thank you for your kind words. I understand you.
    The dream should be that all little girls, should love themselves as they are.
    Not Perfect, just right.
    Best-
    J

  2. TOO MANY THOUGHTS ROLLING ‘ROUND IN MY HEAD… HARD TO ‘SORT THROUGH’ TO GIVE A DECENT COMMENT… I TEND TO ‘RUN SO FAST’ IN MY HEAD WITH ALL THE IMAGES IT BRINGS UP… I GUESS THAT’S JUST ANOTHER WAY TO SAY IT’S AN AWESOME ARTICLE… I NEVER WAS A MODEL OF COURSE, BUT DOESN’T MEAN I DIDN’T WANT TO LOOK LIKE ONE… DDON’T MOST GIRLS GROW UP WITH THAT ‘FAIRYTALE’, ‘PRINCESS’, KIND OF DREAM IN THEIR HEAD…

  3. Well, you are perfect NOW, Jules – even though you are fighting your daily battles (Listening Tears). And you were perfect THEN – before you found yourself in the hands of the beauty wizards; for they are the ones who tempered with your perfection, so to speak … You have come full circle. Can’t you hear the far distant voice beckoning you: Are you surprised my child? Are you surprised that you managed to keep your perfection intact?
    You – we, all of us – were born perfect because God has created us to his image and we fulfill his creation as co-creators. The problem is we are never aware of our perfection incarnated as society starts dictating way too soon … n’est-ce pas? And yes, our human nature is given to us to be transcended but that does not necessarily imply that it is altogether imperfect, does it?
    For what is Perfection? Perfection is that inner voice that has been with you from the moment you entered the womb and that has been with you ever since. You know the one. The one that has never let you down. The one that has always seen clearly through the blur of the dictat. It is the same and other you.
    YOU ARE PERFECT.
    YOU ARE.
    Thank you, as always. For being.
    Xavier

  4. Thank you Mary!
    I appreciate that you took the time to read, and I love your comment. The #pursuitofperfectionisbulsh*t our new mantra!

    (It should be anyway)

    Best-
    J

  5. Your honesty is so refreshing, Julie! I’m not sure why our media continues to barrage us with images of “perfect” people, but thank you for reminding us that nobody’s really “perfect.” So many people keep reaching for unattainable goals.

  6. Thank you Julie !!! I have a fabulous tips to share :

    On my side I am long done with the pricy cream, in fact I
    have never believed in it for some reason…. two years ago I met this nice
    lady who were around her 70’s, Her skin was flawless. Thinking it was one of
    those “lucky gene blessing of life” I commented on her amazing skin
    condition…. She answered really excited to share “I have a secret!!! In the
    shower everyday wash your face with baking soda”…. Wow!!! That’s pretty cool.
    I read about Baking soda and yes it made total sense to me. I have done so for
    now a year! And its’ my miracle. FYI: my skin is mixed and really sensitive at
    time. Well now I have no more redness, no more itchy patches, my skin tone has
    improve greatly and most of all, acne and breakout doesn’t even appear any
    longer. I have made my 14 years old use it, even through he is not a regular
    user as you could imagine at this age and being a boy, his skin clears out
    completely within 24 hours, no more inflammation from acne… its amazing to
    me! Try it and you won’t regret it! I’ll recommend to do your own home work on
    Baking soda, it’s a number 1 item to have for so many little problem fix …Julie

  7. Michele- you are too kind! I am so happy you like the site! Thanks for the sharing. Blessings to you, as well as love – ALWAYS! x

  8. Julie – I am so in awe of all you have accomplished in life. You are truly an amazing woman. This is a wonderful site and I will share it with every woman I know. Love you and God bless…xoxoxo

  9. I LOVE Julie’s witty and worldly commentary! Looking forward to reading more of her words. I can use the inspiration…and practical beauty tips!

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